The Marcus Graham Chronicles is my personal journey of dealing with love and relationships. It is called the Marcus Graham Chronicles because of my affinity for the movie “Boomerang” and how the main character of Marcus Graham relates to me as the “black professional” man. You can check out earlier posts in this series HERE.
There were a lot of things when I was a teenager that I was hell-bent on accomplishing. It is probably one of the weirdest and most vain things I have ever wanted to do. Ever since I could remember I have always wanted to be an Ebony/Jet bachelor of the year. I know! I know! SMH! You are probably thinking out of all the accolades a man could want…this is what you would want? I had everything from the way I wanted my pic to look all the way to the abstract and “philosophical” things I would say in my profile.
During Boomerang, Marcus has a scene where he is trying to come at Jacqueline pretty hard and he says to her, “Check it. Like Jet magazine. This is my Mack daddy vibe I am giving you. In all its splendor…Eleganza Mack Daddy of the Month. What’s Up”
The scene as comical as it is peaks into the egotistical psyche of most men. The overwhelming psyche of thought is the idea of a lot of women desiring you. Every man no matter how old or how young he is loves when a woman admires them especially if the woman is attractive. Regardless of a man’s relationship status he will always like a woman flirting with him. I told you before how noncie makes the world go round. Why do you think strip clubs, some women, salesman, and women promotional street teams are so successful? You didn’t think it was free for ladies before 11 for fun did you?
Every man has what I like to call the Playa S-Curve. The Playa S-Curve is in the same vein of the general economic S-Curve but with a twist. A type of curve which shows the growth of women desiring him in terms of another variable, often expressed as units of time. Let’s break down the concept even more. Every man goes through different phases in life where for whatever reason or combination of things he has a higher want amongst women. It really can’t be quantified with numbers or measured because it is an energy and vibe. Every man goes through ups and downs just like the curve does. Some men have lower deeps or even higher highs. A man can even run into his Jacqueline and have his whole Playa S-Curve tarnished by a woman who may not even be the one for him. One of the biggest questions I ask myself is: Do I want to depend on my confidence and feeling to be totally predicated on the Playa S-Curve?
I like every other man has fallen victim to the feminine energy in our presence. When I was younger I figured the way I could get the most optimal attention from women without being a celebrity or athlete was to be listed in Ebony’s “Top Bachelors of the Year” edition of the magazine. Talk about ego being stroked to the 20th power! Think about it…the average man in Seattle gets featured as one of the Top Bachelors of the year. That is like the closest thing to him being drafted in the first round of the NFL/NBA draft. I know that something as miniscule as being named Top Bachelor was it still was just the hunger of the ideal that pulled me.
Most men don’t really like to admit it but from time to time we love to have our ego’s stroked. Sometimes we don’t even care about the actually hittin’ the woman it’s just the thought that she wants me to hit that can do so much more. For example, one of my homies was names as one of Essence Magazine’s “Do Right Brothers of the Year”. Besides me being somewhat envious that he reached the ego “Promise land” before me the brother received over 500 email messages. Messages from not only women trying to get at him but mothers, aunts, grandmas trying to hook their family members up with him. Women were virtually throwing their panties at him via cyberspace. He didn’t even respond to a 1/4 of the emails and I understood why because it wasn’t all about actually conquering the women but the idea that he was a viable commodity.
The male ego can be one of the most ugliest things because that attention and want of women can morph into wanting to conquer the women for more than just attention but the noncie itself. The problem is that most men can’t differentiate between just the attention and having to rabbit dance with the chick. Some many just love women plain and simple and that attention they are receiving isn’t always the best attention to have. All men know that new pussy is better than old pussy but like Chris Rock said is new pussy worth losing the old pussy?
Overtime I have realized that “the hunger” for the admiration of many women have tempered a bit with maturity. I came to recognize that the best attention and most fulfilling attention is from one special lady not a myriad of women. At the end of the day, who cares if a lot of women are feeling them or attempting to push up on them if they are only there for a season? I have had to come to the realization that I will always love the attention from women regardless of my age but the caveat of it all is how I will respond to this feminine energy. Because if I don’t keep it in check I will continually be Writing Letters to Ex’s.
The idea of being a Ebony Top Bachelor of the year doesn’t entice me as much as it once did. I don’t really covet that attention as much as I used to. I have definitely been trying to evolve my mind state out of the Marcus Graham Condition. You have to come to point in life where you understand what in life you think you want and what it is you truly need. But, still a part of me can’t front I still wouldn’t mind getting a call saying I am a Ebony Top Bachelor…I mean let’s be for real I am evolving but a brotha still wouldn’t mind the little attention. *Kanye Shrug*