In a post I wrote a few weeks ago “Who’s is It?….Not Yours” I wrote about the misconception of men believing they “own” a woman’s noncie (aka vagina). You know the proverbial, “that’s my ish right there” sentiment some men have. Within my comments section there was somewhat of a debate over women who withhold the noncie from a man. It was actually an interesting debate. One of the commenters, Chris Renee (@AuthorChrisRene), had an interesting perspective when it comes to men being “rationed” sex from a woman. I think that a woman who practices this or does hold out is potentially setting themselves up for disaster. But, I am going to let Chris take the floor and give her perspective on the topic as my guest poster this week. I mean, I did have a lot to say when I wrote about the After The Orgasm and a man’s moment of clarity so why shouldn’t we get the woman’s perspective on giving up the noncie or lack there of?
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How many times have you gotten yourself worked up thinking about your woman all day? It’s been a few days since you last got it in and you have a few new moves or two that will have her undoubtedly screaming, “its yours baby, all yours” (feel free to insert eye roll here). You hurry through dinner, rush through the shower, and eagerly you reach the bedroom only to find her asleep. Or God forbid she threw on the granny panties and hair bonnet. You’re now perplexed on how she missed your not so subtle signs of animalistic desires. There MUST be someone else, at least that’s what your ego tells you.
Let’s face it, most men (I didn’t say all so chill out) are too arrogant to admit that they are the actual problem. That’s right, you aren’t getting any because, you sir have dropped the ball somewhere. There’s not a conspiracy going on that your woman is involved in. In fact, if you were to slow your roll you could probably see exactly where you went wrong. Contrary to popular belief, women don’t want to use sex as a weapon. We enjoy sex as much as men do (if not more). Women are just better at turning the light switch off.
Sex for most women is not just about how long a man is hanging. It’s a spiritual and emotional connection. I can’t get my groove on (even though I know how bad I want it) if thoughts of your stupidity is clouding my mind. It’s not a malicious attack on your manhood sweetie. Women don’t all read the same handbook and decide Chapter 1. Vagina Should be Used as Weapon Of Mass Destruction, as our personal guide.
However, women (from the church girl to video vixen) are aware that men will do absolutely ANYTHING for a shot at it. You don’t have to admit it out loud, but how many miles as a teenager did you walk for some? As a man, how many times have you low-key stalked a woman because you wanted some? Once the actual spell has worn off, how many times have you set alone shaking your head at yourself? You won’t say it but you are in fact, a pussy for pussy. Now you are knee-deep in your feelings. This woman has something you desire and its now wrapped in attitude and the dreaded period panties (ALL men hate those). Your main question should not be, why she acting stupid with the snatch? But more so, what did I do to make her feel this way? (go ahead and roll your eyes, but how will that help your blue balls?) What can I do to make this better?
For starters, acknowledge her feelings (preferably done without you tugging at her undies). Talk the problem out (but don’t try and jump her bones immediately after). The key to the locked goodies is simply, communication. If you’ve done all that and she still won’t give it up…… Jody’s Got Your Girl and Gone (that’s a blues song for all you 90′s babies.)
Interesting!!! Speak Your Thoughts!
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Great perspective by Chris! I agree with your point. It begins and ends with the communication. You have nothing if you can’t communicate. But it’s also funny b/c women want the sex JUST as much as we do. My resolution…talk…have sex…then talk again!
I luv it!!!! Chris you have spoken my words exactly…Men take her advice, it just may be your kryptonite for those ladies who play extremely hard to get in the long run!!!
Its amazes me how some people perspective on sex is this mystical event. When the stars and moon aligns at a perfect perpendicular alignment…smh….Now I agree that if you cook anything at the right temperature for long enough the meat comes falling off the bone….But for a woman to expect a man to do everything that day perfect or else he wont get the nookie, they are playing with a dangerous animal…Within a relationship sex is essential as a man consoling the woman, supporting her, or pouring attention and affection. For a man to say well you didnt put my lunch out this morning so holla at me tomorrow is also playing with fire.
………So in short follow the menu’s specified directions
@Ace I did not get do as I say or it’s lockdown for you from what I read. I interpreted it as how can you expect a woman to be ready and willing to bend over for you when you didn’t even take the time to ask her how was her day??? Furthermore, this is two sided b/c women need to be doing the same thing. From both parties the sexual relationship needs to begin with communication and mutual respect and it will go a long way for both parties involved.
@Heather your correct. As with anything in a relationship a couple has to find a common ground. I just rebuke…..yes I said rebuke ……the thought process of the “Giving You Some” mentality. Basically I’m saying sex is not a gift. It is a point of a relationship as is Time, Attentiveness, Money, or Affection. Just my three cents.
whoever wrote this blog, i have some advice for you: chill on the parenthesis. your overuse of them makes your blog seem unprofessional (and it’s annoying).
I wonder if her unprofessionalism got her that major book deal!!!! lol I will assume that comment was suppose to be constructive criticism….
I love debates between men and women. Always interesting to see the different point of views. As for Big Black Ant, I thank you for your advice. I’m glad you read it. However, I have been blogging for 5 years and I never had a complaint before. At the end of the day, you read it. Have a great evening sweetie (even though I don’t mean it)
I’m glad u kept this conversation going! I am going to keep it real short sweet and real. If a chick tries or is ignorant to sexyin her dude. She better have a side dude because her dude will surely be bangin the chick who is satisfying those needs
Whats funny is even though you coming off strong you speaking truth as well…lol
I can dig what u saying. But who’s making love to your old lady, while you were out making love?
I mean if I have exhausted the communication and still aint getting none. I would rather know she is cheating at least that would give me some form of clarity if my chick wasn’t given me any. Chicks have it twisted like I said once agin trying to ration the pussy. If you keep sweatin yourself you’ll end up finding yourself by yourself