3 Reasons You Should Be Disappointed Herman Cain Dropped Out

Make sure you go checkout my brand new podcast series Straight Outta Lo Cash. This weeks episode we talk about Herman Cain and his women, Yo! MTV Raps, Bishop Eddie Long, Bernie Fine, and dating women on “the scene”. Check it out HERE!!

Last week there was a tragedy in the political community the great Herman Cain “suspended” his campaign for the Republican Party’s nomination for the presidential election. There are many people who are happy that Herman Cain has left the election. I have even criticized one Herman Cain in my post “Herman Cain and Uncle Ruckus…Same Person?” but the more and more the debate and election went on I started to have an affinity for one Herman Cain.  When Herman Cain left the election you would think I would be happy and joyous to have him sit down somewhere (I still believe that the slogan “Let Herm Cook” was beyond hilarious). But, I caution you to have those feelings toward Herman Cain. Because after really thinking about it Herman Cain leaving this election is not totally a good thing.  We should miss Herman Cain in this election. Here are three reasons you should be disappointed that Herman Cain left the republican presidential race.

The Republican Debates Are Going to Be Boring as Hell

Like or dislike Barack Obama the Republican Party’s candidates outside of Mitt Romney have NO chance to even give Barack Obama any competition in 2012.  The Republican race had some spice to it with Herman Cain.  Michelle Bachmann, Newt Gingrich, Rick Perry, and Rick Santorum don’t bring that swagger that the great Herman Cain brought to these debates. As much as I love Ron Paul he doesn’t do much in the debates but look like he needs to grow into his suits. Herman Cain with that “slick country talk” got people’s juices flowing. He was garnering so much attention during the debates that candidates like Michelle Bachmann are still channeling him. Let’s be for real, you can’t tell me hearing him refer everything to his 9-9-9 campaign was something of comedic genius.

Moderator:  What do you think about the situation in Libya?

Herman Cain: What street is that on?

Moderator: Mr. Cain I’m talking about African country

Cain: Oh yeah I knew that! Well, if you look deeply into my 9-9-9 plan you will see.  That if we just send 9.99 a month we can feed a poor African child.

The Ho Train

Herman Cain had more women than the Hammer video Pumps and a Bump. He had women coming out from everywhere. Herman Cain was a man with a pocket full of dough and a group of average women to spend it on. It was better than an episode of “Young and The Restless” seeing the women keep coming out making claims that he had affairs or “sexually assaulted” them.  If anyone remembers the Godfather from wrestling fame he used to have this thing called a “Ho Train” where a series of women would come out with him before his match. That’s how the Herman Cain sexual saga looked every week. It was like the Price is Right but with average looking chicks being called down.  People think Herman Cain was ousted from the election because of the “ho train” but it wasn’t the ho train was just the icing on the cake. One Herman Cain and Tiger Woods both learned that cheating with average looking women isn’t as safe as men thought in the past.

The Reaffirmation that Uncle Toms DO still Exist

The way Herman Cain consistently tried to feed into the Republican moniker over his campaign was comical.  The problem was he was very bad at even being a Republican Candidate. I wrote about this before in my post on Juan Williams and Uncle Tomism but there is nothing wrong with being black. One can criticize the community but one has to be a part of the upliftment as well. Let’s keep it real for a 2nd I am not saying Herman Cain is all the way an Uncle Tom but I will say this he surely has Uncle Tom tendencies. It seems that we take the word Uncle Tom super abrasive when actuality there ARE Uncle Toms in this world who are ashamed of being black and want to push themselves away from anything that associates them to black. Herman Cain being in the race reminds us that there are people who under the guise of retorting  that African-Americans need to do better but are not giving solutions or working to help. Herman Cain was really about serving an agenda of attaching himself to the mainstream world to sell a few books and get a little popular.  Herman Cain through his antics and quotes about black people remind the world that bigotry and hatred doesn’t necessarily have an identifiable face.

I joke and chide about Herman Cain a lot because he is just that a funny caricature of what the Republican Party identifies as a “good black man”.  Look at all the support he got until they found out he didn’t know a damn thing about Foreign Policy and the 9-9-9 plan really did sound like a dropped Godfather’s pizza campaign. At the end of the day black people are not monolithic and that’s what makes black people misunderstood the most. As much as I think Herman Cain is teetering Uncle Tomism he does present that every black person doesn’t have the same ideology. At the end of the day I am going to miss one Herman Cain and maybe you should a little more too!

9 responses to “3 Reasons You Should Be Disappointed Herman Cain Dropped Out

  1. Herman Cain, more than anything, provided entertainment. As a black man, I acknowledge his success. However, I abhor some of his beliefs and policies. I can admit though: he always made things interesting. He was almost like the African American version of Sarah Palin: so inherently ridiculous that you couldn’t be totally offended.

  2. Hahahaha! Great satire and real talk in this! Herman Cain made himself so much of a joke. He shows you how crazy some of the GOP is to EVER believe in him

  3. Dear Herman Cain,

    I’m praying for you. I have a few quick questions for you that were not asked during the debates. I find it so very hard to believe that a man as smart in business as you appear to be, can be so dumb in real life experiences. How in the hell do you have a friend for 13 years that you’re paying bills for (of course only out of the kindness of your heart) and your wife not know she… exists? How can you have such bad luck with 6 women (all independent of each other) could, out of nowhere, accuse you of sexual harassment? Is it possible you should start taking Focus Factor? Did you forget about Tiger and text messaging? Herman did you not know that if you run for President that people would see you on the television and possibly speak up.. If you pay rent for 13 years and stop did you think she would wish you well in the race? Your lack of foreign policy knowledge and your inability to formulate clear sentences were not your downfall, it turns out that the Peter Principle was your greatest downfall. In closing I would urge you to contact Tiger and ask for his therapist’s name. It worked for him but realize he hasn’t won a single tournament since this happened (till now) and he, my friend, was the very best in the world at what he did. Best Wishes and good luck with your remaining half. I’m sure we will see you again if only on a lifetime movie– Take Care

  4. One of the fundamental reasons why this is not a good thing that Herman Cain is out of the campaign for President is the shameful realities about racial prejudice and racism in America the concerted negative attacks on him unveil. Like him or not, what happened to Herman Cain happens to Black men and women everyday. Racists can destroy our reputations without any substantive piece of evidence. Herman Cain is a refreshing candidate who truly represented what it means to not be of Washington.

  5. NOT Big Daddy Herman Cain! You are too funny for this one!! Great satirical post with a few gems up in it!! I want to say this as well Herman Cain is a victim of his own ego and arrogance more than anything. From his idea that he can run for president to all the women he was running around with

  6. Pingback: 7 Things My Grown Ass Has Learned This Year « From Ashy to Classy·

  7. Pingback: Herman Cain and Uncle Ruckus…Same Person? « From Ashy to Classy·

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s