If you haven’t make sure you check out this week’s episode of the “Straight Outta Lo Cash” Radio Show. This week’s show “Its Only My baby Mama” feat. Arlington Lane.You can also subscribe to the show on I-Tunes or listen on your Android, I-Phone, I-Pad or Black berry of Stitcher Radio.
The Disney network and media have sold out society the idea that relationships can be and will be built like the fairy tales. The Cinderella or Snow White story has been told to not only women but men as well. There is nothing wrong with having that fantasy but how much do we buy into that and how much we buy into the reality in front of us. Some of these fantasies we believe This week’s guest post will be from Jamala Mete (@SimplyMilele) of “Who I am Effects Who You Are” who previous wrote the very controversial guest post “Why Can’t You Turn A Ho Into a Housewife”. The post generated so much conversation that I wrote a response post to it from a male perspective “You Can Change a Ho Into a Housewife…In Theory”. This time she is back to talk to the readers about the difference between their fantasy and reality.
From a very early age little girls are taught that one day they will fall madly in love with a man who will love, honor, protect and respect her …. AND ONLY HER for the rest of her life. He will be handsome, intelligent, well-spoken, strong, manly and willing to slay dragons just to be with her. There will be nothing in the world stronger than their love and he will simply ADORE everything about her.
Imagine her surprise when she encounters a myriad of men who are not looking to sweep her off her feet and be her hero. She slowly but surely begins to wake up from the fairytale that she has been dreaming of for as long as she can remember. For some women this a liberating process, they are no longer bond to being a “princess” or “damsel in distress“, they are now free to live their life in full color without a scripted outcome. It opens a new world of possibilities outside of those that have been fed to them.
For others it can be devastating, they put their worth and happiness in their ability (or lack there of) to fulfill this fairytale. They don’t understand why they keep running into “The big bad wolf” or other villainous men (there can only be one hero per story). The have a cookie cutter imagine of their “hero” that most men pale in comparisons too.
And what of the little boys raised to believe that they will one day meet a virginal dazzling attractive woman who sees him not as every one else does but for his true self. She will need him to save her from all the other men who chase her but she has no interest in and she will caterer to his every wish after that magical kiss. (Don’t act like men dont buy into that BS as well)
He is just as surprised when he realizes most women are not virgins, don’t need to be “saved” and want to be catered to as much if not more than him. Again for some men this is a “get out of jail” free card. But for some their dream becomes as murky as the jilted distressed princess.
For the former the dating scene can become a brand new adventure full of new possibilities. For the latter it can become a battlefield filled with memories of failure and “lost love”.
Where do you fit into the picture?
- Open Friday: Dating is Like a Poker Game? (ashy2classy.net)
- Damn, I’m A Choosey Lover: The Marcus Graham Condition Redux (ashy2classy.net)
- Why Do Nice Guys Finish Last? (up4discussion.org)
- Penis envy. (field-negro.blogspot.com)
- Fairytale Dating (girltherapy.wordpress.com)
- Got It Or Not, Are You Tricking? (writerzblockblog.wordpress.com)