Whats up man! Digging everything going on here at From Ashy to Classy. You always keep me thinking and love to see what new thoughts and ideas you bring to the readers.
Since I have all the pleasantries out-of-the-way let me get into the reason I am writing this letter. For the last year and a half I have kind of been in a relationship two women simultaneously. I guess you can call them both “girlfriends” per say. I have not made it official with either woman but I admittedly have treated both of them like they are the only one. One woman leaves in my city and the other woman lives a few miles from my city so I am rarely in the same places with them. Each woman is totally different than the other woman and I love each one of them with all my heart for different things. I know I am kinda wrong for leading both women down a winding road. I have talked to both of them extensively about marriage. I have come to a crossroads where I know I need to choose one of the women. But, the problem is that I really really love both women. Any words from you and your readers will be appreciated.
Rick The Ruler
Damn man! You must have read the last edition of Open Friday from a female reader because these are very similar situations. Can I call you Slick Rick The Ruler cause maintaining ONE woman is hard enough but to maintain a relationship with TWO women over a year and a half is something else. You sound like Denzel Washington’s character Bleek in Mo’ Better Blues. I hope you didn’t buy them the same dress.First, keep it real with yourself more because the innocence you are trying to display isn’t a good look. You don’t kind of have two girlfriends….YOU DO have two girlfriends. I know more than you think I do about being caught in a position you are in (Like I really do).
You are certainly in a tough position that YOU have put yourself in. You have to take the onus on yourself from leading both women on to believe that are the only one (because playa to playa that’s what we know you did). Personally I come from the angle that I believe someone can really love more than one person at a time. You can love different people for different reasons and love who they are. BUT at the end of the day you can’t continually satisfy your selfish needs from both women. Now you may have read the guest post on here about polygamy and maybe it being viable but that stuff sounds good in theory but in application it doesn’t.
I have always written that the biggest ally and enemy for a man is his ego. Like I have said before a lot of men including myself have been in this position so it is nothing new. But, at some point you have to separate your ego from the reality of the situation. Just like I wrote about in my lessons of Love from Bishop Magic Duan Juan you have to decipher the difference between your love from the women and your ego of just losing them. You need to take time away for yourself and see where you want to be. Because one or both of these women you may not want to be with. It can get confusing for us men separating this ego from reality because sometimes in this world all you have is your ego to lean on but in this situation your ego is effecting multiple people’s lives. Like before I have been in a situation like you before that I talked about in one of The Marcus Graham Chronicles: “No Dime Left Behind”. You basically are taking the good attributes of both woman and combining them together to make a mental perfect woman like the chick in “Weird Science“. And if you have ever seen that movie you see what happened to their “perfect woman”.
At the end of the day this rodeo show that you have been able to pull off for the last year and a half will and has to come to a screeching halt at some point. Either you are going to man up and end it yourself or you can find yourself in a Waiting Exhale sequel and with neither women by your side but a part of me believes that you may not even want to be with either woman…You may need to love them both enough to let them go.
What do you think about Rick The Ruler’s situation with having two girlfriends? Chime in?
Make sure you check out this week’s episode of the “Straight Outta Lo Cash” Radio Show. This week’s show ” What’s Love Got to Do With It?” with graphic artist and hip hop culturalist Rhasad ”Shadzilla” Whittier”. You can also subscribe to the show on I-Tunes or listen on your Android, I-Phone, I-Pad or Black berry with Stitcher Radio.