My male friend and I always seem to have this discussion because for the life of me, personally, I didn’t get it. Him and a female friend are doing everything a COUPLE would do: text/call each other everyday, have sex, show PDA, he gives her money, buys her things etc BUT he says they are not dating. At first, I was like ‘WHAT?! All of that for over 6 months and you guys are not dating??’ What am I missing?? His response, ‘I don’t believe in titles. I care for her, she cares for me. I’m not ready for a relationship.’ Ummm hello??? You don’t converse with any other women, she’s the only one you take out…help me out ya’ll!! So after a few arguments, doing some research I semi understand where he’s coming from because friends help out friends all the time but….
Ok so I’m old fashion: flirt with a guy, get the digits, we go out and connect, stay in contact, go out more, start liking each other than the DATING begins. I believe when you’re dating it means you look forward to building something with that person and not ‘sow your oats’ (I believe that’s the correct phrase) everywhere else (disagree if you may). Now I know this is the new age and everybody is doing things extremely different. There’s more ‘go with the flow’ attitudes floating around here rather than people sitting down and having an adult conversation about where this could be going. I know who does that anymore?? Well honestly if people started doing that don’t you think it will be less tire slashing, crazy people and less tension? Another thing is that people are not addressing their needs or feelings upfront which could cause some strain in the relationship or whatever you want to call it.
Gentlemen you can’t continue to sweet talk a lady, give her some ‘good’ almost everyday and not expect any questions. I mean don’t get me wrong, it’s some women that have a ‘no strings attached’ rule but that’s rare. In a females eyes if the tables were switched and the guy see he is not a priority, then he most likely will get upset. For obvious reasons, he want you all to himself but don’t want to be committed or doesn’t want anyone to have you (especially if you got that ‘come back’). So petty of them!
What’s popular now are the side chicks. These chicks have a known popularity all across the world from celebrities to everyday normal human beings like us. Women look at these chicks as desperate, whores, skanks, or ‘can’t get their own man’ types but in reality who can you blame? Don’t get your panties in hunch lades, no I don’t agree with a man cheating and having another piece on the side but this woman has no idea how to consume the attention, gifts, PDA, attention and….love. See the guy is talking mad game and this girl feeds into it without knowing his situation.
In this case, a title is discovered: sidechick.
But how much trouble do think would have been saved if this was talked about upfront? The moral of my story kids is when you meet someone make sure you know what you are getting into before the feelings get too attached. Trust me, I have had instances were I was led on because my fantasies were fulfilled but it didn’t turn into a happily ever after ending. People get their hearts broken because of this and unnecessary arguments. Who wants all that drama and there’s not even a relationship established?
It doesn’t make sense to try to claim someone by doing things for them, satisfying them in so many ways but not commit? I asked my friend, ‘if you are not dating this girl, why drag her along with whatever you are doing for her?’ No real answer was given but I know and come on, everybody is not stupid! He gets upset if she is out with someone else which is retarded to me. I’m the type of chick who gets it and some men are intimidated by that but hey what can I say? Titles…do they even exist anymore?
Make sure you check out this week’s episode of the “Straight Outta Lo Cash” Radio Show. This week’s show “F*** Chuck Norris and Any 70+ year Old Man” with special guest singer JLR. You can also subscribe to the show on I-Tunes or listen on your Android, I-Phone, or I-Pad with Stitcher Radio.