To Those Underappreciated Fathers

I wanted to write something for the singles fathers out there doing an excellent job raising their kids, but especially the ones who are raising daughters alone. One day is not enough to honor them, but I would like them to know that they are being notice for their hard work.

Fathers,

A father’s love is unconditional and has a great influence on a child. I remember my father being there for me for many things…falling off my bike, when I had a bad dream, kids picking on me at school, wiping my tears. I wouldn’t know what I would do if I was not allowed to see my father, talk to him when I wanted to, or hug & kiss him.  I grew up as a daddy’s girl. (still am) No matter what problems I had, to me my father was the only one who could fix it and make things all better. My father always expected me to do my best in whatever I did, and he believed in me no matter what my dreams were.
Believing in me has been one of the greatest gifts from him.

father daughter brushing teeth1My father taught me to stand up for myself, and to speak up for those who didn’t have a voice. My father’s unconditional love helped me to love myself.  He knew how important his role was in our family, and he’s playing his role down to this day. Being in my life allowed me to form views of myself based on how he  related to me as a child and growing up.

It is so important that fathers be part of their daughter’s life.  For personality, values, and behavior reasons. Sometimes a father has to fight for both himself & his daughter to be in each other lives. The fathers who fight to be and stay in his daughter’s  life will ultimately be rewarded with their love. Daughters respect fathers who are strong, courageous and protective. There’s just something special about a father/ daughter relationship….. Hearing that  little sweet voice say ” I love you daddy.” Fatherhood  is a big pair of shoes to fill and the responsibility is weighty, but a daughter only has one father, and no one can take his place. Fathers must be actively involved in their daughters lives. This means spending some one on one time together and talking to her on a regular basis. Some may think that a father doesn’t know what to say, how to talk, or what to do with his daughter if he’s left to raise her alone. If mothers can learn the ropes give fathers a fighting chance to learn as well.

To often fathers don’t get the credit they deserved for trying so hard.  Trying to be a father that their little princess will always remember who her really  king is. A father daughter relationship is one of the most important relationship that a daughter will have. She will compare every boy/man she likes to her father, but none will ever come close. She needs a loving, available father in her life rather divorced or at home, she needs to know that her daddy will always be there for her no matter what.  Fathers are so much more than a paycheck, or someone who just provides basic needs. They should be much more to their daughters then just another man that’s in their lives.  Whether the father is in the same house or not, he should support his daughter by showing up at her events, not just talking to her, but listening to her as well.

A daughter needs to hear her father telling her from a young age that she’s beautiful & smart. Hearing those two words early on in life will help her self-esteem as she grows up in this hard cold world.  Tell her how much you love her, how important she is to you. Society puts too much emphasize on mother-daughter relationships so much more than father- daughter relationships. Which is so unfair, because when a father puts his time & effort to be active in his daughter life society would see that daughters are well-adjusted and happy with dad as they are with mom.  Sadly, some mothers are jealous when it comes to the father having a good relationship with their daughters,and will try their best to break that bond between father/daughter . To keep that relationship going down the right path, fathers must continue to spend time together, eat meals together, have a bedtime ritual & encourage their daughters to come to them for advice.

600-01276408Both fathers and daughters benefit from spending time with each other. It seems like fathers spend more time with their sons, maybe they feel like they don’t have anything in common with their daughters, or they my feel inadequate. But, with a little understanding fathers can feel comfortable around their daughters. It’s very important that they connect with their daughters as they grow up, because they will remember that their daddy took the time,and put in the hard work to connect and to get close. No matter how old she is, getting to know each other on a personal, emotionally level will deepen the bond.  So, whether you are raising her in a two-parent, or single -parent home, as a father you are her role model, which means you have the power to shape the women your baby girl will become.

As fathers, it’s your responsibility to reach out to your kids and to make sure you have a good strong relationship with them…..(sons or daughters), but fathers who have daughters, step up and be that man your daughter needs you to be. You love her, so show her how important it is for you to be in her life. Fathers, fight and fight hard, but right for your daughters.

This was written for three fathers I know and who have gone/going through things as a father to a daughter(s), and still seems to come off on top.

Hugs & support to:
M.W.R.
H.L.M.
N.R.P.

This guest post is courtesy of Tonya Mooney and she can be reached on twitter @nappy4life.

Make sure you check out this week’s episode of the “Straight Outta Lo Cash” Radio Show. This week’s show “Step Into The Arena” . You can also subscribe to the show on I-Tunes or listen on your Android, I-Phone, or I-Pad with Stitcher Radio.

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2 responses to “To Those Underappreciated Fathers

  1. Pingback: just a thought: #14 | more than 140 characters.·

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